Alright P Arty, let's do this.

Brothers and sisters,

We gather here today to mourn the loss of three great men, who lived their lives for no other purpose than to kill zombies. Well, not Goose Fraba - he was a worthless scout.

These noble gentlemen decided to take their own lives by jumping out of buildings, rather than feed the evil zombies, contributing to their XP.

Goose Fraba, a citizen of Gibsonton and a lowly scout, was found this morning outside of the The Goulding Building. While he was found with three wirecutters in his possesion, cause of death was determined to be head trauma caused by the high-force fall to the ground. Rumors are that his last words were, "Stay alive!"

Yaba Haba, a citizen of Osmondville was found in similar condition, but with an empty pistol. Before taking his life in such a noble fashion, Mr. Haba emptied his last two clips at a horde of zombies, just to try and weaken them. His loyalty will not be forgotten. Rumors are that his last words were, "Stay alive!"

Pahayden, a citizen of Wray Heights was seen by three fellow safehouse occupants this morning, as he flung himself from the fifth story of the Pincott Building. After dropping all of his supplies for the fellow resistors to use, he proclaimed his hatred for zombies, and of course said "Stay alive!"

You will all be missed, gentlemen.

Instead of flowers, the three fallen heroes have requested donations be made to the Haydenism Foundation.